2341hrs
6th Dec...

A few minute to 7th dec. And i cant sleep cause when i
think about marriage. I have nothing and i am not good
in relationship. It scary and i cant sleep at all. There is
so much i have to do once i am a husband. I try to
think i will go with the flow but its not so easy as it
sounds. Damn i am going crazy. Like i have to leave
to work outside. And when i was younger i told myself
i will be with her. Man this is not so easy....Called
Ricardo for drink but tells me out of stock and only
thing i have is my guitar. Guess i will play the song
that i composed the whole day to comfort myself.
The whole day was depressing and in the evening
was a disaster. Had told myself i will not smoke or
smoke less and i finished like 27 stick thewhole day.
Shit whats happenning to me, am like a smoke
machine. This is really danger of me. May be i was
alone the whole day too. Marriage is scary but i
have to no matter what get married next year. I just
cant avoide always. I have to  and i have to.
2354hrs and this is all and going to play guiter and
eat snack that munna bought for me. Before i sleep